FORGET WHAT YOU NEED TO REMEMBER / REMEMBER WHAT YOU NEED TO FORGET
A Scumbag Brain post.
Your manager asks how you are in the lift and you say "you too". Your brain replays it every night for a week, in high definition, with a director's commentary. Two in the morning, finally drifting off. Brain: "Remember what you said to Lucy in Year 9?" Lucy has forgotten. Lucy has three children and a mortgage. You will never forget. You walk into the kitchen with great purpose. You stand there. You have no idea why. You go back to the sofa, sit down, and it comes to you: the oven. The oven is on. The perfect comeback to your brother arrives in the shower, two days after the argument. It's devastating. It's articulate. It's no use to anyone now, so you say it to the shampoo. **Why it caught on:** someone put Scumbag Steve's patterned hat, the hat that marks anything as a scumbag, on a human brain. Everyone's brain betrays them like this, and it's comforting to blame a hat.